Self-forgiveness

While most ppl are busy making their New Year resolutions  , maybe I should begin this brand new year not with any particular agenda but with a giant gesture of self - forgiveness for all the resolutions of the past which I never accomplished !!!

Yes  ,  let me forgive myself for all the things I ever tried to do  ,  but failed to finish  ;  Let me forgive myself for the times I shattered my own best intentions  ;  Let me forgive myself for the healthy diet which only lasted for three days  ;  Let me forgive myself for the pile of manuscript pages sitting in the bottom of my drawer ,  that I never quite figured out how to make into an article which I can publish  ;  Let me forgive myself for the daily meditation practice which I still have not cultivated ;  Let me  forgive myself for the forgiveness of others that I yet to learned how to manage  ;  Let me forgive myself for not being able to stop my tears from falling in the public ;  Let me forgive myself for being mean and saying the bitchy things ;   Let me forgive myself for letting another year passed in which I did not learn to speak Mandarin or French like a native  ;  Let me forgive myself for all the times I tried to do something of significance ,  yet couldn't seem to get around to it  ...  But most of all ,  let me never let my  downfalls , embarrassments and shortcomings stop me from trying again ...  Yes , I am  always ashamed of trying again after my failure ,  coz I feel like I'm nothing but a screw-up !!!  So let me forgive myself and then not be afraid to start over ... Yes ,  the only way I can ever have the chance of advancement is by ongoing to try ... Maybe  I can make it or maybe not ... but that's  fine  ...   just let me try again, for the hell of it  ...  seriously  ~  otherwise , what else am I gonna do with the rest of my life ? !